amberstories's Blog

In a relationship, married or not..You should read this.

Marriage.

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

 I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

 She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

 Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

 Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

 But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

 

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. 

Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

xoxo
Amberstories

RULES:

1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.

2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.

3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.

4. Tag 21 friends.

5. Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.

6. Have Fun!

 

if someone says 'are you okay', you say?

OMG

 

how would you describe yourself?

Written in the stars

 

what do you like in a guy/girl?

Hold my hands (;

 

how do you feel today?

ohhh na na whats my name?? lol

 

what is your life's purpose?

theres a place for us

 

what's your motto?

Price Tag

 

what do your friends think of you?

Just a dream :)

 

what do your parents think of you?

fearless :DD

 

what do you think about very often?

I wont  :P

 

what is 2 + 2?

My wish

 

what do you think of your best friend?

Only girl in the world :DDD ahahahhahaha!!

 

what is your life story?

Midnight bottle

 

what do you want to be when you grow up?

Begin again

 

what do you think when you see the person you like?

Like a G6 AHAHAHAHA!

 

what will you dance to at your wedding?

Here comes goodbye :( awww

 

what will they play at your funeral?

Make heaven wait :P

 

what is your hobby/interest?

Party in the USA

 

what is your biggest fear?

Waiting for yesterday

 

what is your biggest secret?

Smile ;)

 

what do you want right now?

The salt water room :D

 

what do you think of your friends?

Hatin on the club :P

 

what will you post this as?

Cinderella

Hey everyone.. emmm i wont be blogging here anytime soon but i will be blogging on my blogspot. do check it out its
http://solitaryamberthane.blogspot.com/
Check it out.. u can follow if u want too.. really :)
Love always
AMBER

Heeey!!!! :))

I was just looking through and i saw my goal and it says to be less shy.. :)) sooo i decide to post this... a little about myself.. Its Called 101 about me

1. What is your name?
 Amberlicia Abigail Anthony Thane
2. How many pets do you own?
      1
3. First three digits of your home phone?
    not saying
4. Color of your hair?
     like brownish, black
5. What city & country were you born in?
    i am born in canada
6. What is the # of your house?
    ??
7. What brand is your everyday purse?
   my grey roxy one!
8. Do you rather socks or no socks?
    no socks
9. What ethnic backround are you?
   French, Dutch, German, american indian, malaysian.. err 100% mixed?
10. How old are you?
   17
11. Are your parents married?
   yupps!
12. Do you rather being serious or being funny?
   funny!
13. What date and year were you born?
    not telling
14. Do you rather singing or dancing?
   dancing
15. How old are your parents?
  i cant remember off the top of my head haha
16. Do you have long hair?
  nooope.
17. How many siblings do you have?
  1 sister that I love!
18. What is the color of your eyes?
  brown.
19. Do you have a PC or a MAC? 
  PC
20. How tall are you? 
  5'6''
21. Do you rather love or lust?
  love.
22. Favorite Television chanell ?
  umm idk i just flip through em!
23. What do you look for in a partner?
   trust , honestly , funny, laid back.
24. Are you a virgin?
  yeshh
25. Are you interested in anyone?
  yeahh! :)
26. How old were you when you lost your virginity?
  i havent lost it yet!
27. If you could buy one thing right now what would it be?
  Ipad
28. Have you done drugs?
 nope
29. How many people have you had sex with ?
 none
30. Do you want children?
  yeah, when im older
31. Do you rather dogs or cats?
 dogs (haha ily taylor)
32. If you want children, what genders (write in order)?
  female, male
33. Do you drink?
  no
34. If you wear makeup what is your usual style?
 little bit of mascara
35. What hair color do you like on your partner?
 i dont care
36. How many people have you dated?
 umm 1
37. Have you ever been overweight?
 Yesh..
38. Do you know your neighbours names?
   no
39. Have you ever ridden a rollercoaster?
   yaaaah ,
40. Fav. song?
    Pick Me- Justin Bieber
41. Do you rather being attatched or unattatched?
   attatcheeed!
42. Have you ever had a eating disorder?
  no
43. Have you ever been to a beach?
   lottt's .
44. Do you work out?
  sometimes
45. Fav. Fast food?
   Burger King!
46. Ever ridden a horse?
   yeaaa.
47. Ever walked in on your parents having sex?
  no eww
48. Do you own your own camera?
  yaaaa
49. Ever been on a plane?
  yesssiree.
50. How much do you weigh?
 55kg(123 pounds)
51. what is your lucky #?
  8
52. Do you rather shorts or pants?
 shoorts.
53. What is your birth sign?
 Libra??
54. Fav. quote?
 Spongebob: What do you do when Im gone? Patrik: wait for you to come back!
55. What other websites do you veiw daily?
 twitter, facebook, and yeah EP
56. Do you rather sprite or 7-up?
  spriteee.
57. Do you respect your body?
  nooo not exactly.
58. Do you rather muscle or fat?
  musclee..
59. Fav. Non-alcoholic drink?
  SMART WATER
60. Fav. brand of condom?
  wow...??
61. Would you rather write with a pen or pencil?
  pennn.
62. What is the size of your shoes?
  8.
63. DO you rather sping or fall?
   spring =]
64. Do you rather saying LOL or LMAO?
  LOL
65. What is the last four digits of your cell #?
 0000
66. Ever been pregnant?
  oh yeah...NO!
67. What is your mother's name?
   Penny
68. Do you have any tattoos? If so , where and what of?
  well...none!
69. What did you spend your last 20$ bill on?
  a new top
70. What is your dads name?
  Anthony
71. Ever harmed yourself purposly?
 no.
72. Have you ever had unprotected sex? If so how many times?
 no
73. Your funniest moment this week?
I jump on the chair when my dog touch my feet , i tought it was a RAT!!.
74. Do you rather cellphone or camera?
 Camera
75. What do you find you have a bad habbit of saying?
  sorry when i dont need to be
76. If you had to choose one piece of makeup what would it be?
  mascaara.
77. Ever gotten someone pregnant?
  noo , im not a guy..
78. Whats your fav. vegetable?
  corn!
79. Whats your fav. sport?
  Swim
80. Last job you had?
  Model
81. Do you rather black or white?
  black
82. Do you have a penis or a vagina?
  vagina... LOL.
84. Have you ever broken a bone?
  my ankel when I was like 7
85. Whats your have sex position?
  nothing
86. Last time you had sex?
  none
87. What is your biggest fear?
  BIG BEES
88. If you want children, how many?
  2
89. What is your fav. alcoholic drink?
  none
90. What is your fav. fruit?
  orannnges.
91. Do you sing in the shower?
  yeah
92. Are you clostrophobic?
  sometimes.
93. How many times do you jack off in a day?
  im not a guuuy ?
94. What size is your bed?
  full.
95. What does your everyday outfit usually look like?
  depends
96. Do you rather coke or pepsi?
  coooke
97. Do you smoke?
  nooo.
98. Are both your mother's parents alive?
  Noooo
99. Whats always in your hand?
  idk
100. Do you rather summer or winter?
  suuummer summer summmerr
101. Have you been honest this whole quiz?
  uhhuhh
I HOPE U GUYS ENJOYED! U SHUD TRY THIS QUIZ OUT! :P

~AMBERSTORIES~

Hey!

today in arts class we were given a free topic.. its like u get to paint or do anything arty.. Just a how u like and want it to be.. I dont know why but i some how took all the colours and just painted them on my paper.. RAINBOW colours...

Teacher was shock, but he finds it okay.. The more i look into it.. I see the beauty in those colours.. Its like when u look at purple it can just make you sad.. Yellow all guffy and red all anger.. But somehow its all related from red to indigo.. They all represent the colors of our daily emotions.. After all when u look at it u can just smile.. Because i did..

SO when u feel all sad and thight up just take up your hose, turn on the tap or your sprinkler and put it up above the sky and u can find the rainbow.. It surely can colour your day :)

~amber~

Why?? Why?? why does things always dont go our way? Is this some kind of joke.. Why do we sometimes cry for no reasons or just laugh out loud when we want to.. I mean seriously.. Be realistic... I mean its like impossible to laugh or get angry or sad with no reasons at all.. Right??

Some people say that's just the way it is.. But n.. not for me..

Am i just being to realistic..

Some one tells me i need a little fairy tale in my life more often..

Fairytales dont happen.. Its fiction.. Then she told me again all you have to do is belive...

Sooo.. the question is shud i?... belive in fairytales??...

Tell me bout it

~amberstories~

Today is a day i like to say DE-Javu..... I went home like usual.. then off too study after lunch.. but when i bath.. the scene of pappa died ran through my mind.. like continously.... It bugs me..

Then when i study, the memories of him spending time with me when he was still around came back.. I even waited for him to come back at 4.30pm today.. During dinner i acctually stood up from the table ready to take his suppliment for him like i always did...

I prayed and read Sirach 3.. co-inccidently its about Obedience to Parents.. .. Some how i just miss pappa ALOT and i DONT KNOW WHY...

I am off to bed now people.. Nite nite WORLD...

Nite Nite Pappa.. ILY!

WRITTEN FROM THE HEART:
AMBERSTORIES

His awesome man! Currently downloading all his nice song from youtube :)

Anyway school was a bored today,teacher and some of the student was out most of the time cause our co-curriculum day or something like that tomorrow. This is the time our school gona give out the award for those whose good in the club,from what i know,there will be some stall and other performances going on I think (?) It so so so so unfair cause only form 4 and lower 6 compulsory to go to school tomorrow while the rest get to have holiday. ARGH >:( It would be ok if i helping in out stall but too bad i have to sit in the dewan and wait for my turn to go up,you would wana know how awesomely boring it gonna be sitting in the hall waiting ==. I was quite surprise to get the award for Interact club, i dont remember doing much, other than performing :3 so yea, YAY me xD 

Next week is our excel,i gota study again. And this time i make sure there will be NO FAIL SUBJECT. you know ka how uper depress i am with my recent result? so sakit my hati </3 All saint gonna have Leo sports day & beach cleaning at Tanjung Lipat this Sunday,should i go :3? I’ll cross that bridge when it near. well am gonna post up some of the pic from saturday night,wait up ;)

The weather today was like rain then stopped and rain and stopped and rain and stopped and,you get my point xD So the award ceremony went pretty well, thought the performance was a blah. Straight after receive my certificate i went out to find eleen and was suprise quite there’s a Bomba (fire) bus and truck there!
They let us in and have a look,the truck was huge ok, all the stuff there was huge as well, too bad i didnt bring along my camera >:( and another bus is, how do i put this.A moving fireman exhibition (?) i cant explain it, will post up the picture after they upload it :) Other than that,theres police and proton exhibition,i dont know why but it was weird that malaysian school invited them to come and make a exhibition,it was a first.

Our stall is weird as well,they selling mix of things. Jewellery la,Nasi Lemak la, Float la, even drawing henna! i did myself a henna but its in my palm ,wouldnt want to risk drawing it outside or else i have to explain everything to "parents". I draw a very simple one,but im loving it ;) 

*Note: bring my cam everywhere i go

TC
AMBERSTORIES

Hey Yaw!!! Sooo today i went to a function in Pacific sutera for the closing ceremony.. Had lots of fun..
Our theme was One Malaysia and i had the chance to wear their traditional cloth its called a Kebaya..

Its something like A blouse and long skirt but i follows your body shape :) we had buffet style lunch and able to meet a lots of malaysian friends :)) made new frens and most importantly had a great time :)

Enjoy the pics!!! TC!!
amber

Hey yaw!!!

upload few pics of my presentation and performance soon :)) check it out.. on album malaysia

TC

love:
AMBER

Hey Yaw!!!!

I am in Borneo now :)) its awesome here! My second home!! :)) We sang and sang and sang.. had a awesome time.. Staying in SUTERA HARBOUR RESORT! Its a nice resort with really nice staff! :) U guys shud check this hotel out! Ohh and and they serve really good food! :P yuuuum!!

Went swimming training just now.. the pool's fantastic.. Now i am in the room. They have free excess for wii-fi!! How cool's that! ><

Will be an interesting day today! :) cant wait for beach and island for tomorow!!

Beach and pool- LIFE!

Now, siesta and hot chocolate! :P

*ps: the weather here is awesome! summer all year!*

Take Care yaw!

,
Amber

Hey yaw!!!

got somethings to share :)

went to school today.. but didn't went to class.. went backstage instead to practice singing with bestie.. Then perform infront of teachers.. God is was scarry!!!! Nervous.. butterflies in stomach! ~arggghh~

Had lunch in school.. then went home and study :) Then went for a walk by beach.. alone.. It was awesome.. took awesome pics :P

Had fun at beach.. then went tuition Physics..

Now am at home on my hammock like swing chair outside on verendah.. with hot mug and the cold brezee and my lappy.. :)

Ohh n currently in love with the song "FOR THE FIRST TIME" by The script.. AWESOME!! :)) Played it over and over again on lappy and ipod XP

Hope for a better day tommorow!
Loove u all!!
Bye yaw!!
Nite Nite World! :)

~amberstories~

Hey yaw! Check tis song out.. love the lyrics

SO BIG :)

Now wit’ a girl like u, nothing u can do
But give the whole world to her 24-7
When she looking so sweet that kind of body
You dont mind spending all of your time

Now wit’ a girl like you,
I don’t care who,
Passes my way,
Rhianna or Beyonce,
Could holla at me,
It doesn’t mean a thing,
Nothing compares to the joy you bring.

Now i wanna do it up 
Party it up 
spend it up 
So the whole world knows my love for you is So Big
My heart is So Big
My love is So Big
For you,for you…


LOVE IT! :)
Chow now yaw!! :)
~amberstories~

Hey all, soo i got this really meaningful story from my friend who was heart broken by her ex.
check it out yaw :)

TITLE: WHAT HAPPENED??

Boy: I broke up with her.

His Best Friend: What happened?

Boy: She’s just too much for me.

His Best Friend: What makes you say that? What did she do wrong?

Boy: Well, for one.. She only cared about her appearance. Always had to look good, always took forever to get dressed! So insecure..

His Best Friend: So, you broke her heart because she wanted to keep your eyes locked on her? She wanted you to see that you have the prettiest girl under your sleeve and not think otherwise? I see..

Boy: Oh.. Well.. She’d often call me or text me asking where I am, who I’m with, telling me not to smoke, not to drink. She’s so clingy!

His Best Friend: So, you broke her heart because she cares about your well being? Because she cares about you a lot? And her greatest fear is losing you. I see..

Boy: But.. Uhh.. Well, she’d always cry when I say something slightly mean. She can’t handle anything. She’s a crybaby!

His Best Friend: So, you broke her heart because she has feelings? And because she just wanted to hear you say you love her? I see..

Boy: I.. Well! You know, she’d get jealous easily. I could barely talk to other girls! She’s so annoying! I had to hide it from her so she wouldn’t bitch about it.

His Best Friend: So, you broke her heart because she just wanted you to commit to her? She thought you were faithful, but you lied so she could find out later and hurt even more? She just wanted the guy she loves the most to love only her. I see..

Boy: Well, she..

His Best Friend: You broke up with her because she’s good for you? She just wanted the best for you? She’s broken now because you were selfish. Are you proud?

Boy: I broke her heart.. Because I couldn’t see what was happening.. What happened to me?

His Best Friend: You lost the girl that loved you like no one else could. You see? You didn’t want her when all she ever wanted was you. THAT’S what happened.

___________________________________________________

Think about it, when she’s too much for you.. She just wants the best for you. Because to her YOU’RE the best. If you don’t like something, talk to her about it. You mean so much to her. Don’t just give up. Don’t just leave because you want the easy way out. Ya’ Dig?

And my reaction to this story was
OMG!

thanks for reading Yaw.. it will be one of my stories too :)
, AMberSToriES

Girls,

Just because he doesn’t love you now, doesn’t mean he never did. Just because he said you were the most important person in his life, doesn’t mean that you weren’t. Just because he said “forever”, doesn’t mean he lied when he said it. I know it is so easy to doubt these things now that it is over, but maybe he really meant what he said. At the time, he really did love you, he really thought you were the most important person in his life, and he really meant forever. Feelings change and it isn’t something he really had control over. So please, don’t reconsider everything that went on in your relationship… because he really did love you.



~Amberstories~

• long distance relationship proves one of two things. Either how strong a couple is, or how weak they were from the very beginning.

• I'm tired of waking up every single day, to nothing. Its always the same cycle over and over

• think I’m afraid of being happy because whenever I get too happy something bad always happens

• You cant compare me with the girl next door, Because i am one of a kind and thats real

xP

I said mean things that I didn’t really mean.

He went to the store and came back with a little pot of baby pink roses,

saying that “they just reminded me of you”

and gave me a hug.

My dad’s selflessness and

love GMH.

i MISS my DAD

My awesomely screwed up exam is FINALLY OVER, and im so happy that i could just faint* XD haha actually i still have another subject tomorrow that art,but its ok atleast i wont have to read what what akaun penghutang, merah silu, metaphase, isotopes, momentum blablabla again Ha! though there’s this tinny inchi pichi problem, My account project punya kunci kira-kira not balanceeee :O and i have to pass that maths workbook along with this account project of mine ,ee oh. 

move on move on, funny thing happened yesterday. I was reading biology then suddenly winnee called and ask whether i want to be in one of this film making tmr or not,then i was like wuad :O haha ofcause i said yes, i wana try something new,dont you too :D? but i dont know whether izit still on or not, i dont even know what it is for. All i know was some ex Lokyukian wana do some filming. Ah well, just hope everything’ll go on smoothly tomorrow :) 

Ah i gota take my nap now,I havent been in my bed for 2 whole night! no joke mmkay. I slept at the sofa for like 2 hours only cause i scared i wont be able to wake up in the middle of the night to study physic and bio and and and account. All last minute work =.=  pfft. I’m off ;)!

weellll..
Hi peoples :)

I am sick yet still again :( oh dear.. today..  errand house stuff with my aunt.. she was like clean your room. Furbish your closet and bla bla blaa.. so i started the day with school and it ends at 12.30.. Reached home had lunch of apple juice and tuna sandwich.. Then i cleaned my room and furbish my closet.. it all ended at 5..

Dinner was great i get to go to our favourite pitt stop for leisure at New York New York.. had my enourmous chicken chop. I feel my stomach exploding after finishing it.. Soo it pays off all the sweats for cleaning.. Studied add math for 2 & 1/2 hours.. feeling great.. atleast i was not stupid for a day :)

nooow i am onlining .. noo school tomorow! ~wooooohoooooooo~ enjoying life for a moment!

By 12 i am shutting my eyes.. soooo foor nowww

Early Good night world.. :)

,
~amber~